Thursdays 8:30 PM on CBS
Two-and-a-half-men

Berta: Boy, take one day off for a poker tournament, you miss a whole lot around here.
Charlie: You said you were sick.
Berta: I was healed, it's a miracle!

Rose: This is a side of Alan Harper I've never seen before -- forceful, confident
Alan: Oh, thank you
Rose: I don't like it

Alan: We need to talk about boundaries
Rose: It was just my pinky, Alan
Alan: No, that was fun

Waiter: ..and for you sir?
Alan: Whiskey, neat
Charlie: Since when did you drink hard liquor?
Alan: Since right now. I'd order crack if it was on the menu
Waiter: True dat

Chelsea [about Rose]: Fun personality right?
Alan: Unfortunately she six more of them

Alan [getting ready for double date]: How do I look?
Charlie: Don't open that can of worms, you are what you are

Displaying all 6 quotes

Want more Two and a Half Men?

Sign up for our daily newsletter and receive the latest tv news delivered to your inbox for free!

Two and a Half Men Season 6 Episode 21 Quotes

Chelsea [about Rose]: Fun personality right?
Alan: Unfortunately she six more of them

Alan [getting ready for double date]: How do I look?
Charlie: Don't open that can of worms, you are what you are

x Close Ad