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Alan: Is this session confidential?
Cardiologist: Think of me as a priest, except when I touch your nuts, it's strictly business.

Alan: Hello, Doctor.
Cardiologist: Well, I have got some good news .
Alan: Well, let me have it.
Cardiologist: I am banging my receptionist.

I try not to insult people who can come back and haunt me.

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