Family Guy

Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX
Family guy
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TV Announcer: This is Channel 5 news Texas, with Duke Dillon.
Duke: Howdy Texas, I'm Duke Dillon. At the top of the news tonight, authorities have called off their pursuit of a fugitive Rhode Island baby, who was thought to be possessed by the devil.
Lois: Oh, thank god!
Duke: This turn of events came after Vatican scientists announced today, that the devil is not the greatest threat to salvation. Due to last weeks discovery of the Super Devil. Religion reporter Dallas Houston has the story.
Dallas: Thanks Duke, well let me try and get you a clear picture of what we're dealing with here. Here's a photo of the devil, and here's the super devil. Now as you can see, there are some significant differences. The super devil is at least six inches taller, uh, he has a flying motorcycle, and a jar of marmalade that we believe forces you to commit adultery.


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Lois Griffin Quotes, Family Guy Season 5 Episode 15 Quotes, Family Guy Quotes
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Family Guy Season 5 Episode 15 Quotes

Brian: Can you believe that cashier's accent? "Would you like some change for you?"
Stewie: If it weren't for 9/11, they'd be adorable!

(snores) "18% approval ratings"... How'd you like 18% of my foot up your ass?

Dick Chaney