The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSFavorite Howard Wolowitz Quotes
Penny: Who's Adam West?
Sheldon: Who's Adam West!? Leonard, what do you talk about after the coitus?
Wolowitz: My guess is "four minutes, a new record!"
I'd take Sheldon to Switzerland, absolutely. And I'd leave him there.
Howard: Two weeks ago I was an astronaut.
Bernadette: Yeah, well, now you're a Smurf. Keep walking.
Leonard: Come on, guys, push!
Howard: If I push any harder I'm gonna give birth to my colon.
Raj: I can't feel my fingers. Hurry up!
Sheldon: It's the same amount of work no matter how fast you go—basic physics.
Raj: Sheldon, if my fingers ever work again, I've got a job for the middle one
Raj: Too bad, I called dibs.
Wolowitz: You can't just call dibs.
Raj: I can, and I did. Look up "dibs" in Wikipedia.
Sheldon: Dibs does not apply in a bidding war
Leonard: I don't want to go to Texas
Wolowitz: Alright and I do? My people already crossed the desert once. We're done
Wolowitz: This is the thing from the pizza box that keeps the lid from touching the cheese.
Raj: Is that what this is for? In India, the lid just touches the cheese. Of course, we also have rampant poverty and periodic outbreaks of chlorea so a little cardboard on our cheese is no biggie
Bernadette: So we just sit here and stare at a screen and wait for something to happen?
Wolowitz: I did it with you when we watched The Notebook.
Howard: You gotta like this. The girlfriend, the ex-girlfriend bonding over your rooty-tooty stinky booty.
Leonard: Kill me.
Sheldon: It wouldn't help. The human body is capable of being flatulent for hours after death.
Wolowitz: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Wolowitz: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me
Wolowitz: Just imagine ... if he says yes, we'll have an entire summer without Sheldon.
Raj: We could play outside.
Wolowitz: We could sit on the left side of the couch.
Leonard: I could use the bathroom at 8:20!
Raj: Our dreams are very small, aren't they?
I don't like to kiss and tell, but somebody made it to eighth base!
