The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular Mr. Burns Quotes
Mrs. Bouvier: I swear, Monty, you are the devil himself.
Mr. Burns: I...Who told you?! ...Oh, ah, yes.
Mr. Burns: Why, it's Fred Flintstone and his lovely wife, Wilma! Oh, and this must be little Pebbles! Mind if I come in? I brought chocolates.
Homer: Yabba-dabba-doo!
Kill his acorns and make him watch.
Mr. Burns
I'll have 37 snifters of your influenza syrup. One for me, one for Smithers, and the rest for my hounds.
I want to die quietly on my own term crushing as many of those baby sea turtles as I possibly can.
Smithers: I'm so happy I could hug you.
Mr. Burns: And have me smell like cheap drug store cologne the rest of the day? You may hug my shadow.
Well well, if it isn't the Tardy Boys and Nancy Clueless!
Why do I need another penny? I have billions. Still, if I don't take it, that hoodlum over there might.
(Mr. Burns takes Homer out for dinner.)
Mr. Burns: So, Simpson, I hear you like pizza pie.
Homer: I do! My favorite is Chicago deep-dish.
Mr. Burns: Chicago, eh? Well, what if I took us there now?
Homer: Drive to Chicago? I don't have time for that. I have to be back at work by Monday and my boss is a total jerk.
(Homer meets Mr. Burns' flight attendant.)
Svetlana: My name is Svetlana, but you can call me "Hey, baby."
Mr. Burns: And just so you know, she'll do anything for you. Anything except sex. And I do mean anything.
Homer: (Drooling) Ohh, I'm aroused... and confused.
Mr. Burns: You saved my life! There must be something I can do for you.
Homer: (Thinks) A cookie! No, a car! No, a cookie!
Mr. Burns: You're getting a free dinner.
(Homer gasps)
Mr. Burns: With...
Homer: Yeah?
Mr. Burns: ...Me!
Homer: Me? But that's you!
I guess this is the end. I just wish I'd spent more time at the office.
</i> Mr. Burns
