The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXPopular Mr. Burns Quotes
Female Department of Labor Officer: This power plant violates every labor law in the book. We found a missing soccer team from Brazil working in the reactor core!
Mr. Burns: That plane crashed on my property!
Smithers: Someone is charging room service to the company, sir.
Mr. Burns: Well, we'll just see about that!
(Mr. Burns walks over to a cage full of winged monkeys and opens it.)
Mr. Burns: Fly, my pretties, fly!
(The monkeys jump out the window, and fall to the ground.)
Mr. Burns: (Sighs) Continue the research.
Labor Inspector: This plant violates every labor law in the book. We found a missing Brazilian soccer team working in your reactor core!
Mr. Burns: That plane crashed on my property!
Charlie: Well, sir, I won't bore you with the details of our miraculous escape, but we desperately need a real emergency exit!
Mr. Burns: Why, that's a fabulous idea! Anything else you'd like? How about real lead in the radiation shields? Urinal cakes, maybe?
Get back to work, Stuart!
Mr. Burns (<i>to a duck</i>)
Mr Burns: (holding a miniature wooden plane) Do you see this plane, Smithers? This gonna help us to take the Spruce Goose and take us outta here!
Smithers: Excellent model, sir.
Mr. Burns: Uh, model?
Ned: What do you think, Reverend?
Reverend Lovejoy: Once something has been approved by the government, it's no longer immoral.
Crowd: Yeah!
Mr. Burns: By building a casino, I could tighten my stranglehold on this dismal town!
Crowd: Yeah!
(Barney burps)
Crowd: Yeah!
Smithers: Even so, sir, we could stand to lay off a few employees.
Mr. Burns: Oh, very well! (Points at the monitors) Lay off him, him, him, him...(Sees Homer wearing Kissinger's glasses) Hmm...better keep the egghead. He just might come in handy.
Mr. Burns: Ah, my beloved plant. How I miss her...Bah! To Hell with this! Get my razors! Draw a bath! Get these Kleenex boxes off my feet!
Smithers: Certainly, sir. And, uh, the jars of urine?
Mr. Burns: Oh, we'll hang onto those.
Mr. Burns: Thank you so much for visiting our plant, Dr. Kissinger.
Henry Kissinger: It was fun.
Smithers: We'll let you know if your glasses turn up.
Henry Kissinger: Uh...yes, well, I'm sure I left them in the car. (Thinking to himself) No one must know I dropped them in the toilet--not I, the man who drafted the Paris peace accord.
Captain McCallister: I'll need three ships and 50 stout men. We'll sail 'round the horn and return with spices and silk the likes of which ye have never seen.
Mr. Burns: We're building a casino!
Captain McCallister: Arrr...can you give me five minutes?
Mr. Burns: (holding a miniature plane) We'll take the Spruce Goose. Hop in.
Smithers: But sure I
(Burns pulls out a gun)
Mr. Burns: I said hop in.