Rajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
Raj: Oh, okay, great. Now, I can look like Val Kilmer as Batman, instead of Val Kilmer as he looks today.
Howard: All right, you can suck it in a little bit.
It worked. We printed a whistle.
Raj: Are they actually arguing about comic books?
Leonard: No, that can't be right.
Howard: Maybe "Thor's Hammer" is a new color of nail polish.
Did we at least rent the car from Enterprise? Get it? Enterprise? Screw you. That's funny.
Raj: Wool pants in the desert. I feel like I've got poached testicles.
Leonard: Oh, you poor thing, you're sweating. That is so much worse than having your car stolen.
Raj: Your insurance is going to buy you a new car. It's not gonna de-funk my junk.
Leonard: I wasn't screwing around with anyone.
Raj: Of course not. She was just sniffing around your goods because she was hunting for truffles.
Leonard: It's nice to have a young, attractive woman sniffing around the goods.
Raj: I both hate you and want to be you. It's Ryan Gosling all over again.
Raj: I talk with my eyes.
Howard: You look like my little cousin when he's dropping one in his diaper.
Not one cereal mascot is a girl. It's a total breakfast sausage fest.
Raj: I bought her a couple drinks and she gave me her email address.
Wait, doesn't anyone have a-a Rod of Resurrection? If you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Mine just took me to his gynecology office. I got so bored I put vaginal lubricant on the bottom of my shoes and pretended I was ice skating.