The Janitor Quotes
Carla: I thought you were trying to kill me.
Janitor: I fought the urge.
Carla: How did you get all these people to come down here?
Janitor: Fear.
Oh, hey fellas? I'm trying to give somebody evil eye over there. Would you mind breaking it up so I can...? You understand. Thanks, fellas. Very nice of you. I appreciate it! Thank you.
Janitor: Hey. Help me move this weekend.
J.D.'s Narration: We scoff. And we walk away.
Dr. Cox: There will be no whining or crying while we sit here, understood?
J.D.: He seems fine.
Dr. Cox: I wasn't talking to him.
J.D.: I don't whine or cry.
Janitor: Really? Then how do you explain these photos of you whining and crying as you run away from the Kwans' apartment?
J.D.: These are coasters.
Janitor: My camera's broken.
Dr. Cox: You know what, there, Newbie? You can go to the baptism. Now take Jack; Jordan'll kill me if he's not there. Plus, I know you - you're exactly one watered-down appletini away from trying to fix my sister and me.
J.D.: No, thank you. If there's one thing I learned from this guy, it's I need to stop trying to fix people's relationships.
Janitor: You're welcome.
J.D.: I'll do it.
Janitor: I knew you would, you're very predictable.
J.D. & Janitor: No I'm not.
J.D. & Janitor: Stop doing that!
J.D. & Janitor: Peanutbutter egg dirt.
J.D.'s Narration: I hope I can find a way to connect with him.
(J.D. catches an urn before it falls to the floor)
Janitor: Thanks for saving that - that's one of my favorite pieces.
J.D.: You're welcome, friend!
J.D.: Long story short, after confirming it with my bunk-mates, that counselor and his "friendship lotion" were transferred out of our cabin and we never spoke about it again.
Janitor: Well, "what doesn't kill ya..."
J.D.'s Narration: We're as thick as two thieves in a pod!
J.D.: Morning, sunshine!
Janitor: I don't like that.
J.D.: Nobody seems to.
Janitor: After college I went to China. Did all the normal touristy things: I saw the Great Wall, ate the food, had a baby with a local.. you know, just the regular stuff!
Janitor: Now, anyone who caught a jiggle rebound may step up to the death line!
Laverne: I want you to think of this as a corn muffin.
