Patty: I can't believe Homer ruined another family barbecue.
Homer: (offended) Hey! Everybody pees in the pool!
Patty: Not from the diving board!

Homer Simpson, Patty Bouvier
The Simpsons Season 20 Episode 5: "Dangerous Curves"
The Simpsons
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The Simpsons Season 20 Episode 5 Quotes

Homer: How many times must I say I'm sorry?
Marge: You haven't said you're sorry.
Homer: I know. I was hoping the number would be zero.

Sylvia: My horoscope told me I would meet the man of my dreams today.
Homer: Well, a horoscope wouldn't lie to a pretty girl like you.