Betty: I know what you’re up to.
Evelyn: Lowering Sweet Pea’s solo?
Betty: Cute. This entire musical is just one big recruitment drive for you, isn’t it?
Evelyn: I’m sorry, I don’t follow.
Betty: The Farm is sponsoring the play. You strong-armed your way into co-directing, your warm up sermons, exercising trauma through art … screams cult recruitment!
[Evelyn places her hand on Betty’s hand. Betty glares at her]
Evelyn: Betty, dissect these trust issues.
[Evelyn pulls her hand back]
Evelyn: The Farm is producing and I’m co-directing for one simple reason: to have BIG FUN.

Betty: Arch, are you and Josie dating?
Archie: Well, I mean…
Josie: Uhh…
Reggie: Did you know about this?
Veronica: What? No, I had no idea.
Reggie: The fact that your ex boo has a new girlfriend has nothing to do with you suddenly being all in with me?
Evelyn: Veronica, do you have something to share?
Veronica: I just found out that my parents are separating. My family is unconventional, to say the least, but I always thought no matter they’d stay together.
[Betty moves to comfort Veronica]
Evelyn: And that is what in the theater we call a “breakthrough.”

Cheryl: Ummm, did you have a lobotomy for breakfast? You’re wearing my signature color!
Toni: You don’t own the color red. Red existed before you.
Cheryl: Not at Riverdale High. Here, I invented red. I am red.
[Cheryl snaps her fingers and two girls stand behind her]
Cheryl: Sorry, but this school is not big enough for the both of us, faux-pink lady. And I was here first. Go to Centerville High or Westerberg, I don’t care. But you have until first bell Monday to clear every trace of yourself out of these halls. Copy?
[Cheryl flips her hair in Toni’s face and walks away]

I knew my dad would like it.

Evelyn

Kevin: Given how much dancing there is in Heathers, Evelyn and I felt that we should bring on a choreographer. So, give a big Heathers "hello" to Riverdale’s very own Fly Girl, Toni Topaz!
[Everyone claps as Toni walks onto the stage]
Cheryl: Ummm … does anyone have a chainsaw? Because WHAT. THE. F…!

Tobias: Who the hell are you?
Jennifer: Call me “Lightning.” And this ... is payback!
[Jennifer uses her powers to lift Tobias up and electrocute him]

Tobias: It’s always Black Lighting. He thinks he can take my chaos. Wait till I put 12 dazed and enraged metahumans on his punk a**!
Cutter: No, don’t Tobias, think! If you release the pods now, we’ll lose everything we’ve worked toward.
[Tobias grabs her by the throat. She kicks off and draws her blade]
Tobias: So, you’re going to cut me now?
Cutter: No, but I’m leaving you.
[Cutter walks away]
Tobias: Like I give a damn! I can have 10 of you by tomorrow.

Anissa: I kinda like Blackbird. She cool, right?
Jennifer: You’re such an overachiever. It’s not enough you’re in medical school, you gotta be two superheroes. Well, maybe just one now because of Dad’s code?
Anissa: Nah, Blackbird is needed. But I will start planning better and stop lone wolfing it.
Jennifer: You know, I could start coming with you?

Agent Odell: I know exactly who ... and what ... you all are.
Lynn: You need to leave.
Agent Odell: There’s something you need to know. The Markovians have a stockpile of metahumans in pods; the largest on Earth.
Jefferson: You’ve been asked to leave ... nicely.
Agent Odell: Not yet, Mr. Pierce. Thanks to you, the Markovians have Dr. Jace. And here’s the best part, the concentration of metahumans in Freeland from the vaccines and the Green Light experiments make it the greatest threat to Markovia. It’s only a matter of time before they launch a lethal first strike. I’m swearing in Black Lightning, Thunder, and whatever you’re calling yourself, young lady.
[Jennifer inches closer behind Anissa]
Agent Odell: The Markovian war is coming. And Freeland ... *Free*land ... is ground zero.

Alice: Do you love her, FP?
FP: She’s the mother of my children.
Alice: And me? Do you love me?
FP: Doesn’t matter now. It’s over. I’m sorry.

Jughead: What are you doing here?
Gladys: It did me good seeing you and your dad in Toledo. It reminded me of what I’d been missing: the entire family together. As for what I’m gonna do here, I’m gonna get Jellybean into school, find myself a job. Maybe at a garage? How does that all sound to you?
Jughead: Sounds good. Is it true?
Gladys: Oh, Jughead. Look, your dad has got me squeaking now; we’ve got a house with rooms for everyone. I’m looking at this whole thing like a do-over; a chance to be a real family. That’s all I want.

Hiram: No, I want you to keep those ... and the gym.
Archie: I appreciate you helping me out this week, Mr. Lodge, but I don’t want to be in your debt,
Hiram: It’s not a debt, Archie. It’s compensation. It’s a way for me to make amends since I was responsible for launching the Red Paladin quest in the first place.
[Hiram pushes the keys]
Hiram: Take the keys. The gym is yours ... no strings attached.
[Moment of silence]
Archie: Thank you, Mr. Lodge.
[Archie takes the keys and leaves]

The CW Quotes

Agent Odell: I know exactly who ... and what ... you all are.
Lynn: You need to leave.
Agent Odell: There’s something you need to know. The Markovians have a stockpile of metahumans in pods; the largest on Earth.
Jefferson: You’ve been asked to leave ... nicely.
Agent Odell: Not yet, Mr. Pierce. Thanks to you, the Markovians have Dr. Jace. And here’s the best part, the concentration of metahumans in Freeland from the vaccines and the Green Light experiments make it the greatest threat to Markovia. It’s only a matter of time before they launch a lethal first strike. I’m swearing in Black Lightning, Thunder, and whatever you’re calling yourself, young lady.
[Jennifer inches closer behind Anissa]
Agent Odell: The Markovian war is coming. And Freeland ... *Free*land ... is ground zero.

Veronica: What the hell is a "Sticky Maple"?
Kevin: It's kinda what it sounds like. It's a Riverdale thing.
Veronica: No, Kevin, it's a slut-shaming thing. And I'm neither a slut nor am I going to be shamed by someone named, excuse me, Chuck Clayton! Does he really think he can get away with this? Does he not know who I am?! I will cut the brakes on his supped-up phallic symbol.