Peter: Not a word to your mother about my getting canned.
Lois: What?
Peter: Nothing. Ooh, the lost-my-job smells great!
Lois: Excuse me?
Peter: Uh...Meg, honey, could you please pass the fired-my-ass-for-negligence?
Lois: Peter, are you feeling okay?
Peter: What are you talking about, Lois? I feel great. I haven't got a job in the world


Unrated
Characters:
Peter Griffin, Lois Griffin
Episode:
Family Guy Season 1 Episode 1: "Death Has a Shadow"
Show:
Family Guy
Related Quotes:
Peter Griffin Quotes, Lois Griffin Quotes, Family Guy Season 1 Episode 1 Quotes, Family Guy Quotes
Added by:
Added:

Family Guy Season 1 Episode 1 Quotes

Meg: Mom, can I turn the heat up?
Lois: Don't touch the thermostat, Meg. Your father gets upset.
Meg: Come on. This thing goes up to 90.
[Meg adjusts it a little, and Peter suddenly comes into the room]
Peter: Who touched the thermostat?
Meg: God, how does he always know?
Peter: Brain implant, Meg. Every father's got one. Tells you when the kids mess with the dial.
Guy: My thing went off! Your thermostat okay?

You know mother, life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get. Your life, however, is more like a box of active grenades!

Stewie