Gibbs: That's a long swim for an innocent man!
Wayne: I'm not innocent! ...of the imposter stuff...

He's off his meds.

Quinn [regarding Gibbs's intensity]

Eleanor Bishop, will you be my Frodo?

McGee

Nobody goes to the trash room for high tea.

Torres

Bishop: It's actually freezing.
McGee: Says the 90-pound thermostat!

My burger's getting cold, and you're hitting on Yoga Lady!

McGee

Is it *possible* to be former CIA?

Torres

Gibbs: It's a classified government file!
Fornell: I'm a classified government guy!

Fornell: Get your hands off that light switch! You'll ruin the mood.
Gibbs: "The mood"? We gonna make out? What?
Fornell: I'm just trying to express my appreciation for your hospitality and friendship.
Gibbs: You wanna show your appreciation? Stop wearing my clothes!

Dr. Grace [about Quinn's prying]: She's new, Gibbs, but you have her well-trained! What's next? You gonna take me downstairs to your torture room and try to squeeze something outta me?
Gibbs: Sure. What's your preference? Stock a little waterboard, a little bamboo under the fingernails?

Let's go back to what we know -- he's dead. I'm pretty confident about that.

Torres

And the hair slowly went up on Agent Quinn's neck!

Quinn [meeting Abby]

NCIS Quotes

McGee: All right. Well you should probably know that Abby and I used to date?
Bishop: Ew. Like, each other?
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: Wait - isn't that a violation of rule 12, never date a....
McGee: It was a long time ago. After we'd broken up, one night I went to her lab. Found a scribbled piece paper; a list. Potential boyfriends had to fulfill certain conditions by a pre-arranged date or else, goodbye.
Bishop: Such as.
McGee: Things started off relatively normal: opening the door for her, flowers, putting the seat down. Then around number 8, it gets uh...
Bishop: What?
McGee: Does she know you have these?
Bishop: Does she know you have these?
McGee: Yeah she wasn't happy when she found out.
Bishop: These are all very specific.
McGee: Yeah.
Bishop: These ideas apply to you?
McGee: No those rules weren't in place when we were together. At least I don't think so.
Bishop: What's with the two month cutoff? Abby's sabotaging herself. I've seen stuff like this before. We have to talk to her.

I'm more of a Super-Mario guy, myself.

Captain Wescott