The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 22 Quotes
Sideshow Mel: At least the cup is lined with felt.
Moe: Hey Mr. Positive, shut the hell up.
There was a bank error in my favor and I'm spending it all on Oriental Avenue prostitutes.
Monopoly Guy
Milhouse: Satan's path?
Bart: It's gotta be good if Satan put his name on it.
Sorry Marge. I gotta call bullcrap on that one. The '69 Mets will live on forever, but you think anybody cares about Ron Swoboda's wife and kids? Not me, and I assume not Ron Swoboda.
Homer
I made baseball as much fun as doing your taxes!
Bill James
Why did I advertise my drinks specials in "Scientific American?"
Moe
It's a triumph of number-crunching over the human spirit.
Sports Announcer
She can do the kind of math that has letters!
Nelson
You made me love baseball. Not as a collection of numbers, but as an unpredictable, passionate game, beaten in excitement only by every other sport.
Lisa
how about a bench warmer who's afraid of puppets?
Milhouse
Ralph can't play because he's too juiced.
Lisa
Boys don't have feelings, they have muscles.
Homer