So how was jerk practice, boy? Did they teach you how to sing to...

Homer: So how was jerk practice, boy? Did they teach you how to sing to trees, or build crappy furniture out of useless wooden logs? Huh? (chair falls apart on him) D'oh! Stupid poetic justice
Bart: Actually, we were just planning the father-son river rafting trip
Homer: (chuckles) You don't have a son.


Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (3 Votes)
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Characters:
Homer Simpson, Bart Simpson
Episode:
The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 8: "Boy-Scoutz N the Hood"
Show:
The Simpsons
Related Quotes:
Homer Simpson Quotes, Bart Simpson Quotes, The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 8 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 8 Quotes

Homer: Son, there was something I was going to give you at the end of this trip, but since we may not survive, I want you to have it now.
Bart: A real Swiss Army knife! Cool!
Homer: I stole it from that Borgnine guy.
(Scene switches to the other campers confronted with a bear.)
Ernest Borgnine: Don't worry, kids! I'll take care of him with my trusty (searches for his knife)er, er, um, er, uh, hmm.

Homer: Oh, what does it matter? We're doomed!
Ned: (Sees a seagull) Wrong, we're saved! Seagulls always stay near land! They only go out to sea to die!
(The seagull squawks as it lands in the water and dies.)
Homer: Woo-hoo! See that, boy?! Your old man was right, not Flanders! We are doomed! (Points to Ned) In your face, Flanders!

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