On last night's Two and a Half Men, both Alan and Charlie provded how whipped they could be by their respective women.  Alan, when told by Melissa that she won't sleep with him in the back of his car, got a job working for the devil herself, his mother.

Meanwhile, Charlie was ready to do whatever it took to get Jake to be nicer to Chelsea, who was getting annoyed at the awkward teenager.  Find out just how far the boys went in our "Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator" recap.

Now for some of our favorite Two and a Half Men quotes from the episode:

Alan: I was on a date with Melissa
Charlie: How'd it go?
Alan: She broke up with me and I may have to register as a sex offender
Charlie: So at least you had fun | permalink

Melissa: We should have sex in every room
Alan: I don't see why not. We'll have to bring the towel with us. Of course we're going to have to wait a half an hour to give my erectile dysfunction medicine a chance to overcome my anti depressants | permalink

Chelsea [about Jake]: There has to be something beneath that sullen exterior.
Charlie: Yes, a D student with a perpetual boner. | permalink

Evelyn: Alan, I'm trying to sell a house here. Warm cookies smell, good. Hot poop smell, bad | permalink

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