Ashton Kutcher joined the cast of Two and a Half Men as Walden Schmidt, an Internet billionaire who buys Charlie Harper's Malibu beach home after the latter passed away.  Walden is recently having marital problems and who better to give him advice than his new roommate, Alan?

Walden Schmidt Quotes

Alan: The only reason to wear a hat on a date is to cover a bald spot.
Walden: Here you go, for your next date.

Walden: How do I look?
Alan: Your face should be on gay money.

Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: You're like an Alzheimer's patient in a whorehouse.
Alan: What do you mean?
Charlie: You're constantly surprised that you're getting screwed, and you don't want to pay for it

Yeah, hi. I'm watching your commercial cash for gold and you just showed a woman selling her wedding ring for $500. No, I don't want to sell gold, I want to meet her. She's hot and we know her marriage isn't working out.

Charlie