Is it one more year or when you leave for college, because those happen to be two different things.

Haley: You're a freshman, what are you doing in second year math?
Alex: You're a senior, what are you still doing in second year math?
Haley: Not still, again!

I let down my mom and dad today. And even worse, I let down my teacher.

Consider yourself lucky you didn't just get, like, felt up by your mom.

You have your fans, I have mine. And one day, your fans are gonna work for my fans.

Okay just because my uncle is clearly gay, doesn't mean he'd ever want your tacky pink tree. And frankly, we'd rather throw some lights on our coat rack than have to deal with knuckledraggers like you, today of all days...December 16th.

First get a mirror, then you're gonna look into it and you're gonna see a crazy woman. She needs your help.

I think it's cool you're running for town office. It's totally nerdy but that's kind of my thing.

I think somebody has a man crush.

The only stage you're going to be jumping to will have a pole on it!

Claire: Hey how come you guys haven't accepted my friend requests?
Haley: I didn't know you were on Facebook.
Alex: Yeah you said it was only for teenagers or people who wanted to have affairs.

If Haley got pregnant, would you ever pretend she got mono for a few months and then tell everyone the baby's yours?

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley