Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSFavorite Andy Torres Quotes
Andy [to Bobby]: We get along so well, our sons should hang out
Travis: Mr. Torres, I'm 16 years older than your son
Ellie: When Andy and I met, we were in the same circle of friends, but basically, it was just a doink chain that I worked my way around.
Andy: And guess who was last?
Ellie: Andy, punishment for cheating?
Andy: Removing my own genitalia with garden shears while you watch.
Bobby: Come on man, it's time to start living like you have a mustache.
Grayson: Now that's gibberish.
Andy: No, it's not. It means I have to ask myself the ultimate question, what would Burt Reynolds do?
Andy: There's my girl I need a kiss.
Ellie: You'll live.
Ellie: How are you not embarrassed?
Bobby: Sorry Ellie, can't be done.
Andy: It's true, this is the guy who's main goal in life is to party so hard he craps his pants in every country.
Bobby: I already knocked off America and Mexico. Mexico was easy.
Travis: Does this mean my girlfriend doesn't like my short stories?
Andy: Of course not, Trav. No one does.
Bobby: Look at this office! If I ever sold my boat I could live here.
Andy: No.
Jules: Some of us over did it at the pre no more alimony party party, so I made these margaritas with crushed up aspirin.
Andy: They should market this to drunks! Or us.
Grayson: Whoa, Andy, what's up?
Andy: I brought over pizza and beer.
Grayson: Why?
Andy: You know... I'm not sure.
Grayson: Okay, well, I have to go open up my restaurant, so...
Andy: I can't go home yet. They'll just make me come back.
Stan's an explorer like Magellan... or Dora.
Ellie: Are you Cuban today?
Andy: I will be if you like it.
Ellie: Yeah I like it.
