Favorite Barney Stinson Quotes
Barney: I don't come here that often
Waitress: Hey Barney, here's your usual and I'll send you your other usual when she's done stretching
Barney: Thank you kindly, stranger
Lily: Anytime a single guy hangs out with a married woman there are rules that must be followed. Rule number one...
Barney: Don't use the husband's condoms, that's just rude.
Robin: You are gonna love Kelly, she's fun, she's smart, she lives in the moment..
Barney: Translation: She's ugly, she's ugly, she ugs in the ugly.
Robin: Oh, and she's totally hot!
You've been pork free so long you're practically kosher.
Ted: Jeez Lily it's like you have a butt on your chest.
Barney: Whoop whoop whoop whoop!
No offense, Randy, but there is a long list of candidates for this slot. This slot is Vice President of Awesome. And you're like Assistant Undersecretary of Only OK.
Want to come to my house and play telephone? I've got the string you've got the cans.
Robin: We can split a cab to work together, we always have a standing lunch date, and last night, at the hockey game, Curt got us into the locker room and I met Mason Raymond. [gang looks clueless] Left wing for the Vancouver Canucks!
Barney: What's the opposite of name-dropping?
And firing half my department freed up the money to double my own salary, and this chick from Boston was wicked hot in bed last night, and I'm getting more muscular even though I've stopped working out, and I have this amazing poker group, and I smell incredible, just, here, seriously smell me.
Check it, I just drove a Pedi cab 26 blocks and I still smell incredible.
Chrissie I love your glasses. They totally pull focus up from that whole chin situation you got going on. To Chrissie!
Robin: You wanna dance? Let's dance.
Barney: I live for the dance
Robin: Get your other hand, off my ass.
Barney: Sorry, sorry.
