Cameron: I was nervous. There was a lot of different food on the menu, and on the floor and on the wall.
Mitchell: Are we sure we're not exaggerating just a little bit?
Cameron: Were you there, Mitchell? Because I think I would have recognized the only other white or gay person.

Gloria: This part of town, might be very rough, but the people here, Cameron, are the best!
Cameron: I'm pretty sure I had wheels when I parked here.

Oh man, if a spider would have broken in here, he would have been in trouble.

You're so cute when you're angry with you're little fists. I just want to put you in my pocket.

I can't pressure Mitchell. But I really, really, really just want him to get a job so I can go back to being a stay-at-home dad/trophy wife.

Business partners, mergers and acquisitions. Just kidding, we're gay!

Mitchell's new boss: Do you guys surf?
Cameron: Only for bargains on the Web!

Dylan: I don't think we'd like the same music.
Cam: Because I'm gay and only like show tunes?
Dylan: Because you're old.
Cam: Well, that hurt more, Dylan.

Cameron: Did you hear that woman screaming my name?
Mitchell: That was Phil. He had a Red Bull.

This is a coup. When you get in with Jasper, doors open. He's a legacy at Happy Time Preschool.

Cam: People always say I scream Hawaii.
Mitchell: Who says that?
Cam: People...
Mitchell: What people?
Cam: ...You don't know them.

Yes, I've gained a few extra pounds while we were expecting the baby... but that's science. You can't fight it.

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley