Thursdays 10:00 PM on NBC

Well, this could be your only shot of looking cool, so you might want to take it. You never know.

I didn't realize you could do an entire interview in the two minutes I was out of the room.

Sarah: Why don't you guys ask Mark?
Crosby: Who's Mark?

Makeup Man: This little crease will not go away.
Adam: Okay, are we about done?
Makeup Man: No, no. You have a very shiny T-Zone. We're just getting started. It's a lot of work, all right?
Crosby: You know I always tell him he should exfoliate and he just won't listen to me.

Dad, you've got us piled into these cars like sharecroppers, traipsin' all along the state, and we're doing it for you, and you're mad. It's insane.

We don't worry about what you two think, and look at us. We're all smashing successes.

There's always going to be a part of me that loves you. That's just how it is. But I'm really sorry that that part keeps doing horrible things to you. You don't deserve that. You deserve better.

Rachel: How did you get her to forgive you?
Crosby: I delivered her baby. That might not be an option for you, so you might need to think of something different.

Crosby: Does he listen to adult contemporary?
Jasmine: Not all the time.

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