The Office

Thursdays 9:00 PM on NBC

Follow @OfficeTVF

Dwight Schrute Quotes (Page 10)

Season 7, Episode 5: "The Sting"

Dwight: Who is this "the Steve Nash"?
Jim: Phoenix Suns point guard...nothing?
Dwight: No, Mr. jock hipster.
Jim: Well I'm neither of those things so...
• Rating: Unrated

Season 7, Episode 4: "Sex Ed"

Dwight: I left him all the tools he needs. This is do or die. If he chooses correctly, he will conquer the hornets.
Andy: And if he doesn't?
Dwight: He'll die.
Everyone: What? Beg your pardon?
Dwight: When did the phrase "Do or die" become so corrupted?
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Phyllis: I got stung up my dress.
Dwight: Poor hornet.
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Season 7, Episode 3: "Andy's Play"

Dwight: Well that singing got in the way of some perfectly good murders.
• Rating: Unrated

Dwight: I work with that guy. His name's Andy. He's a terrible salesman.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: Fine, I'll go to your little show, but I'm not wearing a cape.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 7, Episode 2: "Counseling"

Dwight: I see you found our magical toy box Jim.
Jim: These are actually forks and knives from the break room.
Dwight: Jim (laughs), to you and me maybe, but come on. To a child's imagination, that's Mr. Fork and Lieutenant Knife...and Miss Fork.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Dwight: Now that I own the building I've been looking for new sources of revenue...and a daycare center? Woohahahaha. Well I guess it's not an evil idea, it's just a regular idea, but there's no good laugh for a regular idea.
• Rating: 2.0 / 5.0

Season 7, Episode 1: "Nepotism"

Pam: Dwight! What are you doing? We've only been in here for like two seconds!
Dwight: I've got 56 ounces of fluid in my bladder and we have to establish a pee corner!
• Rating: 3.0 / 5.0