Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCPopular Gloria Delgado-Pritchett Quotes
Does he have a mallet? Then how does he get hit in the head?
Manny, you were afraid to light the barbecue, but now your eyebrows have grown back and your salmon is legendary!
Gloria: What about the pigeons?
Jay: I don't like them. They're shifty.
He comes from a long line of fishers and smugglers. But I encourage the fishing.
It's hard to sleep in a bed of lies, isn't it, Jay?
I'm Columbian, I know a fake crime scene when I see one.
Gloria: And you really didn't know he was gay?
Jay: I must have, right?
Gloria: This part of town, might be very rough, but the people here, Cameron, are the best!
Cameron: I'm pretty sure I had wheels when I parked here.
Gloria [at chess]: Look at this, papi!
Jay: Easy, you can't sing "We Are The Champions" without your Queen.
Jay: You want scary? When I was his age I lived through the Cuban Missile Crisis. I slept with a butter knife under my pillow in case I had to fight some Soviet colonel.
Gloria: Why?
Jay: Because I could identify all the Commi planes.
Gloria: What are we talking about?!?
Jay: Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven and landed on earth.
Gloria: I didn't... oh, because I'm an angel!
Gloria: We're very different, he's from the city, he has big big business and I come from a small village, very poor but very very beautiful. It is the number one village in all Colombia for all the, what's the word?
Jay: Murders.
Gloria: Yes, the murders
