Gloria: We're very different, he's from the city, he has big big business and I come from a small village, very poor but very very beautiful. It is the number one village in all Colombia for all the, what's the word?
Jay: Murders.
Gloria: Yes, the murders

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Modern Family Season 1 Episode 1 Quotes

Yes, I've gained a few extra pounds while we were expecting the baby... but that's science. You can't fight it.


If Haley got pregnant, would you ever pretend she got mono for a few months and then tell everyone the baby's yours?