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Modern-family

He was up at 5 in the morning ironing, but he also does that when he's depressed so I don't know.

I know how it works. I rented the wrong movie once. Did you see Glenn Gary Glenn and Ross?

Oh so now it's snooping, wanting to know more about your family by looking through their personal things?

Gloria: He's a lying, scheming little sneak. That's my son.
Jay: Our son.

I can't lie to that face. It's a good thing we're not married.

Gloria: You had a 3 hour nap on Sunday.
Jay: I was tired.
Gloria: From what, your 2 hour nap on Saturday?

Jay: This behavior of yours is not gonna fly when you lose your looks.
Gloria: Awww, you'll be long gone by then.

Jay: You and Manny have the closest relationship I've ever seen. Hell he may never form a healthy attachment with another woman after you.
Gloria: You're just saying that.

If she learns how to froth his cappuccino I am history!

He says I make him nervous, that I care too much. That's why I not even allowed to bring him to his haircuts anymore.

This is not my first language. I don't understand English very goodly.

Jay: Just keep hitting all those buttons until something good happens, that's my plan anyway.
Gloria: Woof.

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 136 in total

Modern Family Quotes

I'm sort of like Costco. I'm big, I'm not fancy and I dare you to not like me.

Cameron

Alex: Dad, we haven't had lunch yet.
Phil: Neither have half the kids in Africa. Stop yappin' and get back to work.

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