Modern Family

Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABC
Modern family
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Gloria: You had a 3 hour nap on Sunday.
Jay: I was tired.
Gloria: From what, your 2 hour nap on Saturday?

Jay: This behavior of yours is not gonna fly when you lose your looks.
Gloria: Awww, you'll be long gone by then.

Jay: You and Manny have the closest relationship I've ever seen. Hell he may never form a healthy attachment with another woman after you.
Gloria: You're just saying that.

If she learns how to froth his cappuccino I am history!

He says I make him nervous, that I care too much. That's why I not even allowed to bring him to his haircuts anymore.

This is not my first language. I don't understand English very goodly.

Jay: Just keep hitting all those buttons until something good happens, that's my plan anyway.
Gloria: Woof.

I know a lot of people think I'm attracted to Jay because of his mind. But they're wrong. I'm attracted to him because he's sexy.

Alex: You maybe wanna take a shift carrying this dry ice?
Gloria: No I just had a baby.
Alex: I watched you carry Manny to bed.

Claire: Wow pretty cozy with the new housekeeper huh?
Gloria: She's my sister.
Claire: Wow pretty weird with your sister!

In my village if you didn't drive one of these, you couldn't call yourself a druglord

I am very angry at you and I'm going to make a list of all the things I'm going to scream at you as soon as this baby's out of me.

Displaying quotes 37 - 48 of 143 in total

Modern Family Quotes

It's a body spray called Sex Grenade. One of the divorced dad's in the hotel recommended it.

Luke

What could be more natural than your mother’s tongue in your ear?

Gloria