Grayson: Cheer up, Trav will eventually come by, you raised him to be dependent and helpless.
Jules: Thanks Babe.
Grayson: I knew you'd take that as a compliment.

Grayson: First up, check out the truth: freshly waxed.
Jules: Oooh, it's like a brand new, slightly gay Ferrari.
Grayson: I wish you wouldn't call my beauty regimen "slightly gay."
Jules: And I wish you wouldn't say "beauty regimen.

Jules: Do her nipples look like mine?
Grayson: No.
Bobby: Yeah.
Bobby: Well, I got a hold of them before Trav did.

Grayson: Hey, where'd you go just now?
Jules: I was lying on the floor of the tub sobbing. You don't pee in that, right?

Ellie: Jules Cobb is the light of our group, and as she goes so goes the rest of us. For many years I have been the keeper of that light, but I now pass the torch to you.
Grayson: I'm only taking this torch because I love mime.

My life is Groundhog Day.

You can't pause people.

Grayson: There is no such thing as a happy stroke.
Jules: Then what did Kurt Douglas have?
Grayson: A stroke.

Grayson: It's actually illegal for me to sell after I close.
Ellie: That's why I'm not paying for it.

Grayson: You know when you're kissing Holly and she pushes her gum into your mouth and she sucks it back in? Why is that so hot?
Travis: Probably her big boobs.

Jules: You know what I learned from my friendship with Ellie?
Grayson: There's no such thing as too mean?
Travis: Never let your friends know for sure if you like them?
Jules: Always hold a grudge?

Jules: Way to go new guy.
Grayson: New guy? I am a key member of this group. I provide the sizzle.

Cougar Town Quotes

Jules: Wine in the morning on the weekends. Lets all think about it people.
Bobby: Think about what?
Grayson: Morning drinking.

Jules: It's time to suck up!
Ellie: That's for boys.
Jules: It's time to uterus up!