J.D. Quotes
J.D.: Don't be such a baby! It's a magnetic image. I apologize Mr. Foster. I'm a little upset. My scooter, Sasha, was assassinated this morning.
Turk: Yeah, he was so attached to that thing. He used to wear a bracelet that said "Sasha forever".
J.D.: Come on, Turk. It was just a joke. And I only wore it for one week.
J.D.'s wrist hits the machine
J.D.: Ok so I still wear the bracelet.
J.D.'s narration: So a patient was a dead and one of us was going to be blamed.
Turk's cell phone of dramatic music plays
J.D.: Dude, you've got to change that ring.
Turk: You think so, huh? (Into phone) Mom, not now.
Turk: Can I admit something to you? I kinda missed not getting my hug today.
J.D.: Here comes your vanilla bear!
J.D. leans over to hug him
Turk: J.D., J.D, oh J.D.
J.D. falls out of the tree
J.D.: Did you try to escape?
Turk: I did escape. There was one waiting in the car.
Mr. Sutton: That's Leon. Loves the car rides.
J.D.: Sooo, Mr. Sutton. When you came in with heartburn, I bet you thought I'd kick your butt right outta here. But, not this guy. I admitted you and I stayed up all night studying your EKG because I had a hunch...and no girlfriend. But, it was mostly the hunch thing. And, that hunch paid off because if I hadn't found that blocked artery you'd be dead right now.
J.D.'s Narration: And here comes the gratitude. The two words every doctor lives to hear.
Mr. Sutton: Later, Dude.
J.D.: Elliot, would you do me a favor and cover Mr. Foster for me? I have to go Mr. Sutton's house and get the thank you I deserve.
Carla: You are so obsessing about this.
Turk: It's like the time you you were convinced the cafeteria workers were giving you small waffles. How'd that work out for you?
J.D.: They waffle-ironed my foot. But, this different, buddy. Look, I need a ride.
Turk: Pass.
J.D.: Oh, pass, huh? Well, this is what happened last time you passed.
(J.D. presents his waffle-ironed foot)
Turk: Okay. Put the foot away. Put the waffle foot away.
J.D.'s Narration: After a day like today, there's really only one thing you can do.
(Cut to a bar with J.D., Elliot, Turk and Carla present)
J.D.: (Making a toast) To bad radiologists!
Dr. Cox: (Entering) Wait, wait, let me get in on this. Let's also have a toast to Mr. Foster's widow and his fatherless kids. (Raises his beer bottle and drinks)
Elliot: Dr. Cox, it wasn't our fault!
Dr. Cox: No, because you were lucky. You know as well as I do that it could have been any one of your faults. Congrats again. Have a, eh, have a swell party. (Walks out)
J.D.'s Narration: It's never easy when someone accuses you of screwing up...especially when you know it's true.
Elliot: Did you...eat my mango body butter?
J.D.: No!
J.D.'s Narration: I shmeared it on a bagel.
Janitor: Watch it - wet paint. Kelso's startin' a new line system to help people get around. Green's gonna go to the smoker's lounge; blue, the I.C.U.; yellow to all the exits.
J.D.: What's red for?
Janitor: Sneaker painting.
(Elliot holds her hand up and J.D. runs in to high five)
J.D.: Here's some!
Dr. Cox: You're going to high five that? Bi-hig mistake.
J.D.: I didn't know what I was high fiving. I gotta stop doing that!
Ted: My band has decided we're only singing songs from classic movies now.
J.D.: Ted, I'm a little busy, ok? (Shows his hands which is filled with blood) Toodles.
Dr. Cox: Dorothy, you're going home, are ya?
J.D.: Yep!