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I'm sure it's not biggie, but I'm a horny man so I'm only half present.

I'm no sociopath, I always know what I'm doing is wrong. I'm just a guy that doesn't like taking tests, doing work, and getting yelled at. So if you think about it, I'm the sanest person here.

I'm sorry, you were about to get ridiculous?

I can't believe there are two mahogany bunkbeds in there. I bet that cost you a few allowances.

Jeff: Oh look! Indiana Jones and the Apartment of Perpetual Virginity.
Troy: Chops busted fellow adult, chops busted.

Jeff: You're pathological.
Annie: It's too late for flattery.

You're just a good grade in a tight sweater.

Annie stop. You're acting like a little school girl and not in a hot way.

Wow, Annie. How progressive of you to have a multicultural evil twin?!

Jeff: We've parted ways with our closest, oldest, craziest, most racist, oldest, elderly crazy friend. And he's not coming back.
Pierce: I'm back!

It's a scary, Chang-filled world out there.

I think time flies when you're joking around about movie titles that sound like names for poop.

Displaying quotes 73 - 84 of 246 in total

Community Quotes

Britta don't make jokes, you're bad at it!

Annie

Sensible night, appropriate night.
Snow on ground, left and right.
Round yon purchase of decorative things.
Tolerant rewrite of carols to sing.
Function with relative ease,
Function with relative ease.

Shirley [sung to the tune of "Silent Night"]