Popular Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
Babu: You bad man! You very, very bad man!Jerry: Bad man? Could've my mother been wrong?
Cheryl: You're a very serious person, aren't you?
Jerry: Well, with so many people in the world deprived and unhappy, it doesn't
seem like it would be fair to be cheerful.
Cheryl: I understand.
Elaine: You ever notice how happy people are when they finally get a table? They feel so special because they've been chosen. It's enough to make you SICK!!
Jerry: Boy. You are REALLY hungry.
What is this obsession people have with books? They put them in their houses like they're trophies. What do you need it for after you read it?
Jerry: I got my bags. I'm ready to go.
Elaine: Yeah, you got your bags!
(scene goes to Honolulu International Airport where we see Elaine's luggage going around the baggage terminal)
Jerry: But the question is, are you still master of your domain?
Elaine: I'm queen of the castle.
(Jerry and Nina are watching TV)
Jerry: Don't go in there, you're gonna get shot.
(Gunshot on TV)
Jerry: I told you.
The problem with the mall garage is that everything looks the same. They try to differeriate between levels. They put up different colors, different numbers, different letters. What they need to do is name the levels, like, "Your mother's a whore." You would remember that.
Roy: Don't mind her.Jerry: Oh please, I love her.George: I've just met her, but I'm very impressed.
I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?
Jerry: It still smells.
George: How could it still smell after all that?
Jerry: I don't know.
George: Well, what are you gonna do?
Jerry: I'll tell you what I'm gonna do, I'm selling that car.
George: You're selling the car?
Jerry: You don't understand what I'm up against. This is a force more powerful than anything you can imagine! Even Superman would be helpless against this kind of stench! And I'll take anything I can get for it.
George: Maybe I'll buy it.
Jerry: Are you crazy? Don't you understand what I'm saying to you? This isn't just an odor! You need a priest to get rid of this thing!
(Elaine comes in)
Elaine: I still smell.
Jerry: You see? You see what I'm saying to you? It's a presence! It's the beast!
I heard something...