New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXFavorite Jess Day Quotes
Jess: What's the secret?
Sadie: It's about love, understanding and two sets of boobs!
Jess: You're too late. I'm in love. With Winston.
Winston: You know, it just got stuck up there so far, so quickly.
I am throwing Cece's surprise bachelorette party here tonight, and the only males invited are strippers, so oil up or get out, guys.
I don't think the badger's actually rabid, I think he's just kind of a dick.
Nick isn't even a man. He's some kind of man-boy, man-child hybrid. The other day, I had to tell him not to pull a dog's tail.
He's talking to a woman with a sexuality I won't jump to conclusions about.
Do you have like a box of charity phones you're sending to Africa? Can he just have one of those?
I would have lasted two seconds in the court of the sun king. I think about that all the time.
Jess: Sometimes I think I was bred in a lab to help people.
Winston: You know what else they bred in a lab? Pugs.
Jess: Nick put on some pants or at least some really high socks.
Nick: Really high socks it is then!
Sarah: Do you and my Dad ever dry-lump?
Jess: Uhhh..
Sarah: Have you ever done a 99?
Jess: I think that's a tax form?
Sarah: Have you ever given anyone a plow job?
Jess: I don't know....do you want to learn how to play Bridge?
What's going on? Why is the cast of The Social Network in our apartment?