New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXFavorite Jess Day Quotes
Jess: I got laid off.
Winston: What!?
Nick: Are you serious?
Schmidt: Obama...
Nick: I believe horses are from outer space--
Jess: I believe that, too!
You've all thought about me while self-completing!?
I just wanted to listen to Taylor Swift alone!
How's the new apartment? Does it smell like new paint and compromise?
Jess: When I hear all the stuff about Cece's profession, like the dieting, it's crazy. And the butt-drinking...
Nick: Did you just say "butt-drinking?" You can't say "butt-drinking" and not explain what it is. That's two of my four favorite things.
At least I'm not 23, at least I own a trashcan, at least I can legally rent a car, at least I don't live in a loft with three...at least I live with you guys.
Winston: There are parts of my butt that only a tub can clean.
Jess: Ew, but okay!
Nick: I'm gonna have to turn off the tap!
Jess: What tap?
Nick: The sex tap!
Jess: But I need my vitamin D!
I was sabotaged by my baby box, which means I will never trust anything that comes out of it.
Jess: Where are your nipples, man?
Schmidt: I'll never tell!
So, would you like to freak?
