Ten years? You guys are like Bert and Ernie.

If somebody walked in here and saw us, they'd be like, "Look at these two totally normal roommates. I bet they never sucked face." But we did. You sucked my face.

Jess: Do you want to know what I'm wearing under this shirt?
Nick: Yeah, sure.
Jess: An invisible shirt.

Jess: Where are your nipples, man?
Schmidt: I'll never tell!

Jess: Nick kissed me?
Cece: WHAAAAAAAAAA?

I just wanted to listen to Taylor Swift alone!

It was firm but tender. I saw through space and time for a moment, but that's not the point.

I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me.

What is the big deal? Let's just suck it up and French a little.

Nick: You never listen to pipe talk.
Jess: Pipe talk is boring.

Nick, I need you.

What are you, the doodle police?

New Girl Quotes

Schmidt: Are you in love with me? Because I'm in love with you, deeply. I assume that you would never because I messed this up so many times. You've made it very clear you only want to be friends with me and I value that friendship so much. So it I'm ruining it by doing any of this, please stop me.
Cece: Schmidt. I'm in love with you.

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick