New Girl

Tuesdays 9:00 PM on FOX
New girl
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Jess: Where are your nipples, man?
Schmidt: I'll never tell!

Jess: Nick kissed me?
Cece: WHAAAAAAAAAA?

I just wanted to listen to Taylor Swift alone!

It was firm but tender. I saw through space and time for a moment, but that's not the point.

I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me.

What is the big deal? Let's just suck it up and French a little.

Nick: You never listen to pipe talk.
Jess: Pipe talk is boring.

Nick, I need you.

What are you, the doodle police?

There's more to A Father's Love than just semen! Ew!

I should have brought my stethoscope. I'm seeing a lot of split ends. The cut is all wrong for the shape of its face.

Jess: But I need like a backstory, like why am I mad at the can?
Angie: The can is your ex-boyfriend and he did not respect your space and thought that your arts and crafts section of your house was ridiculous.
Jess: What?!
Angie: Yeah, enough?

Displaying quotes 61 - 72 of 115 in total

New Girl Quotes

I'm not convinced I know how to read, I've just memorized a lot of words.

Nick

I'm gonna bake a cake so moist, girls are gonna be like, 'Ewww, why did you say moist? I hate that word?' and I'm gonna be like, 'Taste the cake!' And they're gonna be like, 'Damn, it's moist!'"

Coach