The Office

Jim Halpert Quotes (Page 10)

Andy: I'm so jealous right now.
Michael: Hey, you know who you shouldn't be jealous of. Yourself. Because you're invited, and you're invited, and you're invited, and you, you and you and you, and you--
Limo driver: Car seats eight.
Michael: What?
Limo driver: The car seats eight.
Michael: The limo seats eight.
Michael: Okay. Then Jim and Pam. And Ryan plus a guest.
Jim and Pam: No thanks.
Ryan: I'll use it when you're done.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: Let me show you what I mean. Your new office. How great is that, right? For a job well done, well, not done.
Ryan: I will, uh, I will do my work, right now. I will stay late tonight.
Jim: Right.
Ryan: Um, I'm very sorry. About everything.
Jim: You're a good kid. You know what, it gets bigger once you're in there. Enjoy.
Ryan: Is there Internet?
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: I just figured you needed a place where you could concentrate. And not be bothered by... bothering people.
Ryan: Okay.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: Really?
Pam: [in character] It wasn't me. I ain't goin' down for this!
Jim: I want to go home.
Pam: Get the keys out of my purse and start the car.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: I'm just gonna skip the what and go right to why.
Michael: Because this is the recreation of a crime scene!
Meredith: I'm the dead body and these are my brain chunks.
Dwight: Shut up, you're dead.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Pam: I think Michael may have snapped.
Jim: Or maybe he's just stuck in character.
Pam: Which is worse? Snapped or stuck?
Jim: Both. They're both worse.
 • Rating: Unrated

Michael: Tube city. You owe me one.
Jim: [interview] Co-managing is a give and take. You have to pick your battles. One of the battles I picked was Michael's idea of running plastic tubes all over the office with hamsters inside of them. He called it Tube City. So, yes, I do owe him one.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Jim: Okay, we need to do something. People are freaking out wondering what's going to happen.
Michael: You're right. They need something. A distraction. Anything new on YouTube? Doesn't have to be good.
 • Rating: 4.5 / 5.0

Jim: Once a year Dwight holds a seminar for us on karate. Because one thing we know that thousand-year-old martial arts do each year is ... change.
 • Rating: 4.1 / 5.0

Jim: In everyone's defense I think the most worthy opponent of you is ... you.
Dwight: That is correct. Unless there happen to be measles present.
 • Rating: 3.0 / 5.0

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