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Skywriting isn't always positive.

We are colleagues with benefits. We're colleagues who benefit from the fact that we're also friends.

I'm sorry, Shauna. I think I need to go. But, um, thank you so much and as always everything I said is off the record. OK? Bye.

Well, the douche, it's a Pawnee tradition and it's where fun meets awesome.. meets agriculture.

And I even called Oprah. Well, I tried to call Oprah. Couldn't get her number. I'm putting it out there, like The Secret. And hopefully she'll call me.

Leslie: Boy, 35 percent.
Ben: It's actually 34.2 percent.
Leslie: 34.2 percent. I am Ben, the numbers robot.

Calzones are pointless. They're just pizza that's harder to eat. No one likes them. Good day, sir.

I know Tammy seems scary, but really she's just a manipulative, psychotic, library book pedaling sex crazed She Demon.

Leslie: Yes. I know exactly when we should do it. Post-pizza, pre-ice cream, between his third and fourth beer. He'll be full but not stuffed. Tipsy but not drunk. Should be around nine.
Ben: OK. So you've thought this through.

Leslie: Calzones are like pizzas but they're harder to eat. They're dumb. And so was that idea.
Ben: Seriously?
Tom: This is embarrassing for you.

I don't know what it is about big, outdoor gatherings that makes everyone wanna urinate all over everything. But it does. And they do.

Ben: Should we throw in some salads for a healthy option?
Tom: Wow, don't be such a Jerry, Ben.
Leslie: Yeah, Ben. These guys are cops. Not ballerinas.

Displaying quotes 205 - 216 of 518 in total

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Parks & Rec Quotes

Andy: From now on, we will be using code names. You can address me as
Eagle One. Ann, code name -- Been There, Don That. April is --
Currently Doing That. Donna is -- It Happened Once in a Dream; Chris,
code name -- If I Had To Pick a Dude. Ben is -- Eagle Two.
Ben: Oh thank God.

Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!

April
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