Jack: Lemon why do you keep spending so much money on Wigs?
Liz: Tracy's head size keeps changing.

Liz: Who flies Newark to Atlantic City?
Carol: Black bachelorette parties.

You sound weird... do you have a beard?

Jack: My naturally blonde lady love and I basked in the three S's: surf, sun and ...
Liz: Sandwiches?

No Tom Jones, no!

I hate people too.

Jenna: Let's Lez!
Liz: No, I meant a book club or something.

Wesley: There's only one Wesley Snipes in this world.
Liz: You know, there isn't.

No, he's just a groomsman ... and a Somali pirate. Careful!

You can't force the fate, you just have to let it wash over you like a spray tan that won't take because your skin is too oily.

Yes, I wrote that! I write all the Fart Doctors!

I know. People wear flip flops to church, and the NBA tattoo situation is out of control.

30 Rock Quotes

Jenna: Oh, I'm not worried because I have something the other actors don't.
Liz: Don't say your sexuality.
Jenna: My sexuality.
Liz: Oh, god, Jenna! When has that ever worked?
Jenna: When has it not worked?!

Passing out and cursing on St. Patrick's Day. Is nothing sacred anymore?