Marge Simpson Quotes
Bart: He's alive!
Marge: And he didn't pee on the floor.
Grampa: For me that's a perfect day.
The kids are a mess. You brought them home exhausted and pretentious.
Marge: You're all bald.
Homer: No, I'm young person cool-bald. Not old person sad-bald.
I don't care for silent auctions. It just encourages hovering.
Homer: That's one way to avoid drunk driving.
Marge: Another way is don't drink.
Homer: I'm not Superman.
Just once I'd like your father to be on a Jumbotron for something good.
This date night was even worse than the date night we saw Date Night.
Marge: Homer, I'm a single mother, trying to raise a family here.
Homer: But you're not-
Marge: Just zip it.
Homer: Now that's what I call a snappy retort.
Marge: Stop saying what you call things! I'm trying to watch the movie.
Marge: This is the stupidest fight ever!
Homer: We've had stupider!
Lisa: Sometimes i wish strangling your kid was still legal.
Marge: Not since they passed Homer's Law.
Homer: How would you like to have future sex?
Marge: Why do you say future this is now?
Homer: I meant a week from tomorrow. That's when the new penis gets here.