Favorite Marshall Eriksen Quotes
Lily: I could totally let you down. Has that thought not occurred to you?
Marshall: Not even for one second. Not having a baby would suck, but the idea of you letting me down, that's impossible. That would be like aliens landing. That's a bad example.
Marshall: Ok, I'm just saying that it's my wedding too and I should have a say in it.
Lily: But I'm the bride. So, I win.
Marshall: But I thought marriage is about two equal partners, sharing a life together.
Lily: Right but I'm the bride. So, I win
Marshall: Ted, Karen's a douche.
Ted: Wow, thanks for sugar-coating it.
Marshall: "Douche" is sugar-coating it
Oh please, we all know how this movie ends. Ted falls in love. Love kicks Ted in the sprouts. Roll credits
Lily: Guess what came in the mail today?
Marshall: Our costumes? Do they rule?
Lily: They rule. And yours is 100% wool so you won't get hypothermia like last year.
Marshall [in deep voice]: Tarzan nipple blue
Claire: So ... why is he wearing the scuba gear?
Marshall: We don't know, Claire. And it's killing us! It's killing us!
Barney: She's got the..'Crazy Eyes'.
Ted: Dude...the eyes...they're CRAZY.
Marshall: What are you guys talking about, the 'Crazy Eyes'?
Barney: It's a well-documented condition of the pupils, or pupi.
Ted: Nope, just pupils.
Barney: It's an indicator of future mental instability
Lily: Honey, this magazine says more and more couples are opting to have nontraditional weddings out in the woods.
Marshall: Well, if a magazine says so, we should go get married in the woods like a couple of squirrels.
Lily: Squirrels don't get married, Marshall.
Marshall: Like you could possibly know that
Ted: I just met the perfect woman. She's funny, she's beautiful, she loves "Star Wars"...
Marshall: Woah woah woah, what's her take on Ewoks?
Ted: Loves them!
Marshall: Oh, good. I don't know why people are so cynical about Ewoks; the Rebellion would have failed without the Ewoks.
Ted: And get this: She's a marine biologist, she spent a year in Antarctica studying penguins.
Marshall: Oh, penguins are cool. Kinda like black-and-white Ewoks. I approve
Ted [commenting on Marshall's Pumpkin Latte joke]: Alright, there's only two reasons she'd laugh at that: one, it's the first joke she's ever heard, or two, she likes you! You should totally ask her out.
Marshall: You think?
Ted: Yea! That's why you're not back with Lily, right? So you can experience what it's like to be single.
Marshall: Well, what if the heart doesn't mean anything? What if she writes it on all the cups?
Ted: Mine says Ted. No heart.
Barney: Mine says S..Sw...Swarley. How'd they get "Swarley" from 'Barney'? Who would ever be called Swarley?
Marshall: Well, all skyscrapers kinda look...like a...
Ted: Marshall, it's a 78 story pink marble tower with a rounded top and two spherical entryways at the front.
Marshall: Wow, so it's the whole package.
Barney: Ha ha ha! Yeah you did!
Marshall: Had to!
Barney: Oh, dude, if they're selling condos you gotta get me in. And don't give me the shaft.
Marshall: Yeah you did!
Barney: Had to!
Who wants a party hat? Look I'm a bird! Let's all be birds!
