Unless you can convince Tom Brady to spend the night, I am not making breakfast for any football players…He is a football player right?

Cam: It's a bird! It's a plane!
Mitchell: It's super out of breath.
Cam: Happy Halloween to you too.

Well that's attractive. You look like a puppy with a slipper.

I can be challenging finding playmates for an exceptional child. I don't mean to brag, but that's why i didn't have any friends.

Claire: Why are you trying to turn this into a fight? I called to yell at you for getting me sick. Love you, bye.
Mitchell: I love you too.

I never get sick. I must've caught some kind of chill on the beach when my socks got wet...My ankles burn.

Cam: Hey counselor, what do I have to do to get you to drop that suit?
Mitchell: Cam what are you doing here?
Cam: Surprising my hugs-band!

Mitchell: There is no easy way to ask this, but are you all high?
Claire: No Mitchell, we're happy.

Cam: Oh my God! It feels like we have one mind and one heart.
Mitchell: And one chair.

Claire: There's a reason I'm the best person.
Mitchell: You know that's just a title for today right?
Claire: Yeah, I'm the best person at this wedding.

Don't cry, you'll streak your bronzer.

Mitchell: This is my second favorite suit of yours.
Cam: Second?
Mitchell: Right after your birthday suit.
Cam: Hey! Cut it out, I'm practically a married man.

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

You're the last person who should give me anything. You got me here. You got me to graduation, to Cal tech. You did it. You're done.

Alex