Nick Miller Quotes
Schmidt fired me and now I'll never get to use this briefcase I bought and it was $19!
What do you call a lunatic who's only got one case and no hobbies? Your worst nightmare.
When you put it like that, it sounds amazing...AND like prison.
Jess: Why does your bottom need to breathe?
Nick: It's like a plant. It needs sun and air.
I've got an uncle whose God-given name is 'Shifty.'
She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping.
Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail?
Schmidt: It's a bar mitzvah!
Nick: I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised.
Nick: I just want to make a good impression on Jess's sister.
Schmidt: Yeah, well, I want Julia Child not to be dead, but here we find ourselves.
Nick: Men don't talk to people they've dated, unless they want sex, or they're Winston.
Winston: I also want sex.
Oh, this is terrible--she's quoting Scripture, but using a ton of cuss words.
Just drive the car. I gotta tell my girlfriend that I don't love her so she doesn't leave me.