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I make that one copy, and I become the girl who makes copies, and by the end of the day I'm receptionist again. And the worst part is, I like making copies. The paper comes out all warm and stuff. And it's cold in there. Cause it's technically a closet.

Michael: We are in the heart of it. [Bathroom sounds rattle the small office.] And the surge of water carries our business out to the sea.
Pam: What should we do now?
Michael: We wait, and hope that people show up to the pancake function.

Pam: Oh no.
Jim: What?
Pam: I'm going with him.
Jim: What? Pam!
Pam: I'm going.
Jim: Pam! You can't be serious.
Pam: Michael, wait! I'm coming with you.
Michael: You are?
Pam: Yeah.
Michael: Okay. It's going to be great.
Pam: Great. Uh, except, I don't want to be a receptionist anymore.
Michael: Right... Executive assistant.
Pam: Salesman.
Michael: Alright, okay. Deal! Okay, well... Jim?
Jim: Still no.

I did it. I learned everything about this machine. I know all the buttons, even the inside ones. I know all the error messages. I could do a bound book, in plastic with offset colors. Which feels...

I'm at a crucial point where I have sunk 4 hours into that copier, and I am not going to let it beat me like that wireless router did.

Michael: Before you got here, I'm the one who landed all these clients. Half of them, at least. I can do it again. I know the market, I know the price points. I'm on it, don't worry. So, how do I do that?
Pam: Well, um, you can scan it, and then you can upload the image, and then you can copy the new image.
Michael: Can't I take some paper and just tape over it with transparent tape?
Pam: Yeah. Good.
Michael: Thank you very much.
Pam: Mmm.

Michael: Pam, listen. This order form. Instead of saying "Dunder Mifflin" at the top is there any way I could get it to say something else?
Pam: Like Michael Scott Paper Company?
Michael: You... oh. Somebody has been talking in bed. Pillow talk.
Pam: Hmm... yeah. Listen Michael. Have you really thought this through? 'Cause it's a pretty big risk.
Michael: This is a dream that I have had since lunch, and I am not giving up on it now.

During the course of business, a copier goes though something called 'Normal wear and tear.'

Kevin: Pam?
Pam: Hmm?
Kevin: When will the new copier be ready?
Pam: I'm working on it Kev.
Kevin: You said it would be ready by today. And it is today.
Pam: It'll be ready soon.
Kevin: Soon could mean anything. Soon could be 3 weeks.
Pam: Is that what 'soon' means to you?
Kevin: Sometimes.
Pam: Then come back soon.

Pam: Okay focus. Focus. You're in the right building, you're with the right people; what happened?
Michael: I looked at Wallace and I said "I quit!" and as I turned to leave I looked back and I said "You have no idea how high I can fly."
Stanley: Did you tell him how sick of him you were?
Michael: Why would I do that?
Angela: Well, wouldn't it feel good to tell him that he was incompetent?
Kevin: That he's wasted 15 years of your life?
Meredith: Did you spit in his face?
Michael: You guys have thought about this a lot more than I have. I just winged it.

He finally has a story everyone wants to hear... and he knows it.

Pam: And then, out of that cake, pops another stripper holding a smaller cake. And then an even smaller stripper pops out of that one.
Michael: What is that smaller stripper holding?
Pam: Cupcake. It's cupcakes and strippers all the way down.
Michael: Ok.

Displaying quotes 145 - 156 of 349 in total

The Office Quotes

I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them.

Andy

Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.

Michael