Pam: My name is Deborah U. Taunt.
Andy: That's clever! Debutante!

Dwight: [reading email] I'm sure you've seen the item in the Journal. I just want to stress that it's all conjecture, if we have any concrete information, you will know ASAP.
Michael: Erin, do we have the journal?
Erin: Your feelings journal? You told me to put it in the time capsule.
Michael: Did you?
Pam: He means the Wall Street Journal, online.
Michael. Oh, the Wall.

Michael's been trying to get me and Jim to hang out with him ever since he started dating my mom. I don't know. I really hoped this thing would just die out, but today he's planning a birthday lunch for my mom and we have to go. No way out. No ... way ... out.

Why did I get in the car? I could have struggled. I have a whistle in my purse, I didn't even blow it.

Dwight: Pam would you care for a bagel?
Pam: Oh, no thank you.
Dwight: Oh, that's right, you're a woman and you need to refuse food the first time. I'll try again. Please Pam, reconsider and have a bagel.
Pam: I have an early lunch.

I used to love coming here. The chicken parm is good, big part of my childhood. Oh! Maybe Michael will start dating that too.

Pam: You're bribing me.
Michael: No! No, no... Unless you want me to! Do you want me to? Because I will. I will bribe you. No... Your face is saying, don't? Unless I haven't offered you enough? Your face isn't changing. What is it! Talk to me face, tell me what Pam's brain is thinking.

Pam: The cake's really good.
Helene: Oh I know! I love when they use butter cream frosting.
Michael: Finish your cake, Helene. I want you to enjoy that cake. Because I have something terrible I need to tell you. And I want you to enjoy your cake before I tell you this terrible, terrible thing.

Manager: And I must say that since we are a family business it's nice to see that you are too.
Andy: Ohhhh! No. Wow. You thought that? Oh my gosh. Oh definitely not.
Manager: My mistake, I'm sorry.
Pam: It's okay.
Andy: Actually it's kind of not okay. I date models. Face models. My girlfriend, on a scale of one to Giselle, uh, a nine.
Manager: That's... that's good for you.
Pam: Anyway, we also have a special on-
Andy: Pam's carrying our surrogate. Because, my girlfriend needed to keep her figure for fashion week. So we, uh, we put our baby in Pam. Doesn't matter what Pam looks like.

Pam: You blew the sale, you idiot!
Andy: Let me tell you something, I was never gonna make that sale.

Pam: You were way meaner to me than I was to you.
Andy: No I wasn't, okay? The very idea of us together made you burst out laughing like you just bit into an Adam Sandler jelly sandwich.

Oscar: Pam, just for the record I think you're over-reacting a little bit. Your mom's old enough to make her own decisions.
Pam: Oh, well, thanks Oscar. I was just wondering, how would you feel if Michael was sleeping with your mom?
Oscar: My mother's in a wheelchair.
Pam Beesly: Well he could still... [pause] I'm sorry about that. [pause] Oh, could I just get you to sign this second page?

The Office Quotes

Pam: So I closed the door but the image of his...
Jim: Baquette.
Pam: ... dangling participle...
Jim: Eww.
Pam: ... still burned in my eyes.
Jim: I can imagine.

Mike gave me a list of his top ten Springsteen songs. Three of them were Huey Lewis and the News. One was Tracy Chapman, Fast Car. And my personal favorite, Short People.

Darryl