Scrubs

Perry Cox Quotes (Page 2)

Cox: Here's what I'm gonna do if someone doesn't tell me who did. I'm gonna make you all retake the test. It's going to be you a new test, it's gonna be ten times as hard. It's not just gonna be on medicine, it's going to be on everything. Baseball, statistic, North Dakota high schools, the geography of a made of fantasy world I like to call Coxatopia. That's a magic land where where rivers run of scotch and hordes of pigs feed on the bones of cheating med students.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Cox: You're not going anywhere.
Denise: Would it make a difference if I told you I had a personal issue that makes staying here really horrible for me?
Cox: It would make me quite a bit happier.
 • Rating: Unrated

Kelso: Bar codes? What the hell is this, a supermarket? That's a human being, for god's sake!
Dr. Cox: Listen, old prospector. I know that any new machine scares you, but here's the well-held secret: you know that box that records your favorite television shows? There isn't a demon inside of it!
Kelso: Then how does it know what I like?! I miss the good old days, when doctors and patients actually got to know each other. You know, back when sexually harassing a nurse was just considered polite chit-chat.
Turk: Yes...the good old days. Back when a man of my color couldn't be a doctor...but could live out his life-long dream of one day driving a white woman to her hair appointments. Yes. Things were much better back then.
Dr. Kelso: See? Turkleton gets it.
 • Rating: Unrated

Cox: I mean around here, you just can't let your work and personal life overlap.
Denise: Yeah, that was always Ally McBeal's problem too. It's so hard being a working woman in the 90s.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jordan: You know that bag of bones my sister Danny married? He died, she got nothing.
Cox: Bert died?
Jodran: You're not listening. Danny got nothing. You need to do your will so I can get all your stuff.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Lucy: You've never been to Maine and you were college roommates with Michael Bolton.
Cox: Yes and the latter fuels most of my anger.
 • Rating: Unrated

Kelso: Can I do the interview with that little number in the second row? She said I reminded her of her grandfather and I think I can use that to at least get her top off.
Cox: You're a hell of an educator, Bob.
Kelso: I do it for them.
 • Rating: Unrated

Cox: Now it is time for a boring announcement about a pointless tradition brought to you by an empty figure head with a failing liver and an over active libido.
Kelso: Thank you, Perry. You and your filled muscle smut.
Cox: I miss this.
Kelso: Yeah me too, it kills me that we're friends now.
 • Rating: Unrated

Perry: To recap, what is the number one attribute all medical school students share with this skeleton?
Lucy: The hollow area of nothing in the skull?
Perry: Exactly.
 • Rating: Unrated

Cole: Hey Dr. Cox, I just finished cleaning that guys foot ulcer.
Dr. Cox: How'd that go for you?
Cole: I'm not gonna lie, I yacked on his face. Other than that.. crushed it!
 • Rating: Unrated

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