Community

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What are you doing in an apartment above Dildopolis? And when did they open a second location?

You ever go into the bathroom and find parsley in your teeth that your friends hadn't told you about? Now imagine your teeth are a uterus and that parsley is a half-chinese baby.

Troy: Is it black Michael Chiklis?
Annie: No!
Pierce: Is it white George Foreman
Britta: You guys are talking about the same person. He's biracial, his name is David and he's a human being.

Abed: It's the first season of Lost on DVD.
Pierce: That's the meaning of Christmas?
Abed: No it's a metaphor. It represents lack of payoff.

What do you care about Christmas Abed? You're Muslim. Don't your people spend this season writing in angry letters to TVGuide?

Shirley: Here, let me help you with that.
Pierce: I broke my legs, not my gender.

Sheesh... I guess it's true what they say about the sync-up.

Britta: I still thing that man is going to evolve into woman, not a dragon monster with three legs.
Pierce: Three legs?

Tell me how to get this laid-back, or I'll kill your families!

I'm gonna slit your butts' throats.

Annie: Can we stop walking in slo-mo now?
Pierce: You guys are walking in slo-mo?

You gain levels, and at a certain point you actually CAN eat a ghost.

Displaying quotes 49 - 60 of 112 in total

Community Quotes

Troy: I think I'm failing psychopharmacology.
Britta: Why are you taking that?
Troy: I thought it was a class about crazy farm animals.

Sensible night, appropriate night.
Snow on ground, left and right.
Round yon purchase of decorative things.
Tolerant rewrite of carols to sing.
Function with relative ease,
Function with relative ease.

Shirley [sung to the tune of "Silent Night"]