How I Met Your Mother

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Robin Scherbatsky Quotes (Page 9)

Season 5, Episode 11: "Last Cigarette Ever"

Don: Look, Robin. You seem like a nice kid, but this is my 39th morning news show, and from those 39 shows I've learned a few things. 1. Avoid the all you can eat sushi buffet in Bismarck. 2. Don't go to the bathroom with your lapel mic still on, and 3. Your entire audience at this hour is one half-drunk slob sitting in his underwear.
Robin: Well let's do a great show for that half-drunk slob.
• Rating: Unrated

Robin: If I can't even get my best friends to watch my show, then what viewers can I possibly get?
Marshall: Lots of people! Bed-ridden insomniacs ... bums peering in department store windows ... people in the ER, where the TV is in a cage and you can't change the channel ...
Lily: Ooh, do you have any stalkers?
Robin: Yeah, but even Leonard won't watch.
• Rating: Unrated

Don: You're stuck in a dead end gig, surrounding by people going, doing the news in your tightie whities.
Robin: That underwear thing as your choice, and I don't like that it's catching on.
• Rating: Unrated

Robin: See my show?
Ted: I meant to watch it. I was just so busy with the being asleep thing, it took eight hours right down the drain.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 5, Episode 10: "The Window"

Barney [to random girl]: Hey.
Robin: Oh, he's not saying hello, he's just telling you what he feeds his horses. Oh man, I could sit here and make "you look like a farmer" jokes all night. Challenge accepted.
• Rating: Unrated

Ted: You know how everyone has that guy or girl that no matter what happens, you know will be perfect for you.
Marshall: Lily.
Robin: Mike Shacks.
Barney: That girl over there.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 5, Episode 9: "Slapsgiving 2: Revenge of the Slap"

Robin: Seriously, you take it.
Ted: You sure?
Robin: Slapsolutely.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ted: This slap was supposed to be a joyous gift. We've let it come between us.
Robin: Oh my God, you're right. This once pure fruit has turned into a poison slapple.
• Rating: Unrated

Robin: Last year you got left at the alter, you lost your job. You've come such a long way from then. I'm so proud of you, Ted. You get to slap someone in the face as hard as you can.
• Rating: Unrated