The Office

Ryan Howard Quotes (Page 9)

Michael: She washes dogs.
Ryan: You're doing it man.
Michael: I know. I don't wanna get ahead of myself, but I think I want her to meet my mom.
Ryan: Hey man, you ever think there's gonna be this massive nuclear holocaust, and after all the major nations are destroyed they'll just be the tribes in the jungle that rise up and survive? The jungle war fare's gonna rule the world?
Michael: Yeah, maybe.
 • Rating: Unrated

Dwight: I don't understand why our website has to have social networking at all.
Jim: Yeah, I actually have to agree with Dwight on that one.
Ryan: It's all about creating a one stop shop consumer experience, alright? You're chatting with your friends, you're talking about the latest music, about the election; all of it is happening in our virtual paper store.
Jim: And then an older gentleman asked you "Boxers or briefs?"
Creed: I don't get the big fuss here, I like the site.
Kelly: If I'd have created a website with as many problems, I'd kill myself.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Yes, the social networking feature of the Dunder Mifflin Infinity website was infiltrated by sexual predators.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Yes, I'm having the Scranton branch come in on one Saturday so they can re-enter sales that they made on the phone as sales that were made by the website which they should have done in the first place, if the website had been working.
 • Rating: Unrated

Jim: Hey man, you mind if I run something by you?
Ryan: Love it. Go.
Jim: Well, I kinda feel like what we have going for us is our customer service, and no matter how we change this up, I don't know that a website's going to be able to replace that.
Ryan: I can tell you thought about this a lot, I appreciate that.
Jim: Thanks.
Ryan: David Wallace does too. You told him all about this at the Christmas party, right?
Jim: Did I? I don't...
Ryan: You did. Yeah.
Jim: Hmm.
Ryan: Watch your back Jim. I'm just kidding.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Do you have a question, Kelly?
Kelly: Yeah, I have a lot of questions. Number one: how dare you?
 • Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Manager: Can I start talking? Is this thing on? Give me a signal when you want me to start.
Ryan: And now from my old hometown, Scranton Pennsylvania, my former boss, Michael Scott.
Michael: Hey, I just think you should know that one of my salesmen beat your stupid computer, so take that [bleep]hole.
Ryan: Always a jokester. How about that image? Crystal clear.
Pizza guy: If anyone out there is listening, I'm being held here against my will. I'm a minor.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Convergence. Viral marketing. We're going guerrilla. We're takin' it to the streets while keeping an eye on the street. Wall Street. I don't want to reinvent the wheel here. In other words, it is what it is. Buyin' paper just became fun.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Well, today was a fantastic waste of time.
Michael: I disagree, I think it was very valuable.
Ryan: Michael, technology helps business OK? You should not resist it, this is the way the world is moving.
Michael: I happen to think the old ways of doing business are better. And I can prove it.
Ryan: Ok. I look forward to hearing your ideas.
 • Rating: Unrated

Ryan: Jan.
Jan: Ryan. Ryan. Ryan, Ryan.
Ryan: So elephant in the room, I have your old job.
Jan: Well, not exactly my job... I had a different title.
Ryan: Oh well, excuse me, same office, same responsibilities.
Jan: Different salary. You'll get there, don't worry.
Ryan: Well... you look great.
Jan: Thank you, thank you.
Ryan: Scranton suits you.
Jan: Best decision I ever made.
Ryan: You were let go.
Jan: You know what? I love the beard. Keep it forever.
 • Rating: Unrated

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