Female football coach, like a male nurse? Sin against nature.

Coach Beiste: You're all coffee and no omelet.
Sue: That doesn't make any sense.

You make not trying to destroy glee club easy because you're doing such a bang-up job yourself.

Even if your team has dropped their sequin-covered panties and urinated all over the stage like an elderly Carol Channing, they literally could not have done worse.

One girl ate a pigeon. That's how badly they wanna be Cheerios.

Will: Inside, you're a really good person. I appreciate what you're doing for these kids. I won't forget it.
Sue: I'm seriously gonna puke in your mouth.

I spent large segments of each day picturing you choking on food, and I recently contacted an exotic animal dealer because I had a very satisfying dream that I once shoved your face into one of those pink-inflamed monkey butts.

It's as barren as me in here.

From Fort Wayne, Indiana, the not-at-all stupidly named, Aural Intensity!

Kiss my ass, Josh Groban! I'm an internationally-ranked cheerleading coach!

Your hair looks like a briar patch. I keep expecting racist, animated Disney characters to pop up and start singing about living on the bayou.

I realize my cultural ascendance only serves to illuminate your own banality. But, face it, I'm legend. It's happened.

Glee Quotes

[to Kurt] You know, these Mounds bars are delicious, but you have to eat them. If you just hold them in your hand hoping that you might get to eat them one day, they're going to melt and you'll look like somebody just pooped in your hand. Don't let waiting for things to maybe work out with Blaine turn you into the guy who looks like somebody just pooped in their hand.

Brittany

I just want somebody to love me.

Quinn