Nobody quits the Cheerios. You either die or I kick you off.

I'm gonna make it a habit to not stop and talk to students because this has been a colossal waste of my time.

So you like show tunes. It doesn't mean you're gay. It just means you're awful.

I might buy a small diaper for your chin, because it looks like a baby's ass.

Some people like to film themselves getting physical with their partner. I happen to enjoy revisiting the impeccable form of my jazzercise routines.

I bribed Will Schuester's landlord to bug his apartment with baby monitors under his couch. And in his bedroom.

I never understood how hard it is to get laughed at, especially in slow motion.

What's that smell? It's coffee. It's usually masked by the smell of fear.

Figgins: I cannot have these shenanigans at this school.
Sue: He cannot have these shenanigans at this school!

As soon as I figure out the difference between slander and libel, I'm suing you.

Student: Hey, Ms. Sylvester, let's get physical.
Sue: Not really my type, but I like that attitude.

On assembly days, I arrange for the rest of the school to be fumigated, so the gym is the only place with clean air.

Glee Quotes

[to Finn] You know, I don't really know what's going to happen between us, but I know that you used to be the guy that would make me feel like the most special girl in the whole world, and it doesn't feel that way anymore. Now it just feels sad and confusing. And the worst part is that it doesn't even feel that bad anymore.


I'm engorged with venom, and triumph.