Favorite Veronica Palmer Quotes
Linda: You make no sound when you walk.
Veronica: Then I am ready to leave the monastery and avenge my parents. I'm kidding. I just buy expensive shoes made from very soft animals.
Veronica: Here, I brought you a cake. And a jar of herring. Maybe you can wait until I leave before you smear the cake with it.
Walter: I'm not Dutch. And the Dutch don't smear herring on half the things you say they day.
Ted: With the public's trust at stake, we all gave depositions. Veronica had done it before and so knew just what to say... or how little to say.
Female Lawyer: Were you involved in the development of this product?
Veronica: Yes.
Female Lawyer: And how would you summarize the company's reaction when they found out that the women who used this product were savagely attacked by insects?
Veronica: Ouch.
Female Lawyer: Will you elaborate on that, please?
Veronica: No.
Female Lawyer: Can you describe your job?
Veronica: Yes.
Female Lawyer: How would you describe your job?
Veronica: Cleverly
Veronica: Chu, chu, chu, chu.
Ted: What are you doing?
Veronica: That's the sound of me deflecting the whiny bitching with my happiness shield.
Because I'm good at everything I do. I'm not bragging, because bragging is the one thing I'm not good at. Although, if I wanted to be, I'd be excellent at that, too. As I just proved.
Now get in there and run that meeting like a shark driving an assault vehicle through a herd of seals wearing chum pants.
You have the most beautiful skin. I wish there was a way I could peel it off your face and attach it to mine. Oh, and then you'd grow new skin and like it just as much
Ted: Hmm. Tased flesh smells bacon-y.
Veronica: Now I'm hungry.
Ted: I have to watch Rose.
Veronica: I can wash Rose.
Ted: I said "watch" her, not "wash" her.
Veronica: Hmm. Even easier.
Ted: The fact that you thought I was going to go wash Rose right now makes me think you may not know that much about children.
Veronica: I know they need to be cleaned
Veronica: Well, you're always welcome here, daughter of Ted.
Ted: Rose.
Veronica: I know her name.
Ted: Rose's name.
Veronica: You know, sweetheart, sometimes your father...
Rose: Ted.
Veronica: I know everyone's name.
Veronica: I know what it's like to see the ugly face of discrimination.
Lem: You do?
Veronica: Yes, I do. When I was 16, I was 5'9" and stunning. I mean, off-the charts gorgeous. At school, I was like a swan among the ugly ducklings. all the other girls hated me. And like our light sensors are doing to you, totally ignored me. If it wasn't for the modeling contracts and the comfort of college boys, I don't know if I would have made it.
Phil: Wow. I had no idea.
Veronica: No, how could you? You're still not 5'9"
Ted: We work well together. Like Batman and...
Veronica: I'm Batman.
Ted: Well, it was my idea. I think...
Veronica: I'm Batman and Robin
