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Ncis

Tony: I don't care how many degrees he has, if he's serious about assassinating Eli, he's gonna need something more than a pistol.
Ziva: Tony, it is not about the size of the gun...
Liat: It is about the will of the shooter... We will make sure they do not succeed. If necessary, we will place ourself in the line of fire.
Tony: "All someone needs is the willingness to trade his life for mine." You know, In The Line of Fire.
McGee: Kennedy said that.
Tony: Why don't you just memorize your lines and don't bump into the furniture, McBartlett. Spencer Tracy said that.

Ziva: We killed you first, Tony.
Tony: Oh, I've seen it a million times. The pretty popular girl gets jealous when the hot new transfer comes in and steals all the spotlight. Well, it's pretty much a staple of every high school movie from the seventies and eighties : Heathers, Fast Times ...
Gibbs: Who got jealous in Fast Times? God, I like Phoebe Cates.

Ziva: Hey guys! (about the trash container) Someone's going to have to go through this. This is disgusting.
Tony: Last time I checked, I was senior field agent.
McGee: It's too bad we don't have a probationary agent with us.
Tony: But we do!
McGee: We do!
Ziva: You're going to pull rank on me?

Ziva: What's wrong? Are you having second thoughts about the role you're going to play?
Tony: She wants me to dress up like... No, I can't. It's sacrilege. I'm gonna have to end it.
Ziva: Oh, come on, Tony, it's only been two days. It's too short - even for you.
Tony: Trust me, Ziva, there's some things a man should never do.
Ziva: We're not talking about a man here, we're talking about you.

McGee: Who's the lucky little vixen, Tony?
Tony: Adult relationship stuff, McTween. You wouldn't understand.
Ziva: (sarcastically) Adult relationship? You?

Vance: Agent David, have you ever been to Zurich?
Ziva: Several times.
Vance: Good. Today you're Switzerland. Between England and the U.S.

Ziva: Apologize.
Tony: What for?
Ziva: For being you.
Tony: Sweetheart, if I had a dollar for every time I did that, I'd be loaded.

Ziva: We hit a shamu.
Susan: Did she mean a snafu?

Tony: Davy Jones. Used to sing with The Monkees.
Ziva: Real monkeys?"
Tony: I envy your brain sometimes.

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